Dating Tips

Ulooking4Me.com has created a few dating tips to help make your internet dating experience fun and safe.
If you are interested in the commonly made mistakes and misconceptions in the online dating scene then please click here.

Tip 1. Complete your personal profile:

For a better and more accurate matching please fully complete your personal profile.
Give a realistic, accurate description of yourself in your personal adverts. Do not pretend to be somebody you're not, as it may result in disappointment for you and other members if things do not go as planned.
A complete profile and detailed personal advert will increase the number of responses you receive.
When placing a personal advert make sure your grammar and spelling is correct.
Personal adverts containing email addresses, phone numbers or other traceable information are forbidden, and consequently will not be approved and placed on Ulooking4Me.com
Keep your personal adverts up to date.

Tip 2. Upload a photo:

Uploading a photo of yourself is really important.
Members with photos get approximately 7 TIMES more responses than those members without photos.
Uploading a photo will increase your chance of meeting other people.
As a registered member you can upload as many as 5 photos.
Every now and then upload a new photo.
Upload a photo now and experience the difference!
Click here for mistakes people make when uploading a photo.

Tip 3. Fill in your search profile:

Specifying your search profile will enable you to limit the number of matches you receive and increase your chances of finding the right person. This can be done without having to browse through hundreds of photos and profiles.
You can search on every characteristic.

Tip 4. Express your interest in other members:

If you see someone you are interested in you can then send him or her a short pre-defined message
Sending a pre-defined message is a simple and effective way to make initial contact with somebody.
Most people will not respond when receiving pre-defined messages, see also Mistake #3. Personalized message are received much better and will invite more people to respond.

Tip 5. Ulooking4Me.com mailbox:

For security and safety reasons Ulooking4Me.com provides an internal mailbox for every Member.
This mailbox system can only be used to contact other members of Ulooking4Me.com. Only Full Members are able to send messages via Ulooking4Me.com mail system.
In order to protect your privacy and remain anonymous do not use your full name or any other identifiable information in the messages sent during initial contact. Once you get to know the person you are making contact with, you may choose to include such details.
What and when you choose to share private information with another contact is your own responsibility.
People who keep annoying you with their messages can be blocked. Messages from blocked members will not be shown in your inbox anymore.
Be mindfull of people who ask for your personal details.
Never give out your bank or creditcard details to anyone on the site!
Do not use offensive language.

Tip 6. Patience is a virtue:

Do not hurry or force other members into meetings.
Do not ask other members for their private/personal details.
Be patient, and do not get upset, if another person is not responding or reacting to your messages in the way you would have liked them to.

Tip 7. Plan a date:

If everything seems ok you can move on to the next step and plan a date.
Prior to meeting with anyone it is advisable that you speak to them on the phone a few times to experience their conversation before meeting with them in person.
If everything still seems ok then plan a short date
On your first date meet in a public place and let your friends know where you are. Take your mobile phone so that you can make contact if need be. Remember your safety is very important and all precautions should be taken in-order to keep you safe at all times.
Do not feel obligated to stay on a date and/or participate in activities that you do not wish too.

Tip 8. Last tip: Have Fun!

The main goal of Ulooking4Me.com is for you to find a partner and/or make new friends. During this process just remember to have fun, enjoy the experience and if things don’t work out the first time, keep in mind that there will always be someone else just around the corner!.

Commonly made mistakes and online dating misconceptions

MISTAKE #1 - "Giving it a try"

Most people start using online personals with the attitude “Let me give it a try and see where it goes”. They don’t really think they WILL meet someone - they only HOPE to meet someone. What's the difference? When you “hope” to succeed, you don’t try hard enough - if it works, great, if it does not work, fine, at least I’ve tried. When you think you “will” meet someone, and it does not work, you change something in your approach to your online dating adventure to get the results you want.

BOTTOM LINE: Don’t “give it a try” - do your best.

MISTAKE #2 - Hoping “the right person will find you”

Most people don’t pay when posting their profiles on online dating sites, which usually means they can receive letters but cannot answer ads of other members. They hope people will be writing to them. If you are an 18-year-old model-type girl, this may work for you. But if you are not, then you shouldn’t hope your dream partner would email you out of blue. You will get much better results if you pay for premium membership to the dating site and write to people yourself.

BOTTOM LINE: Contact other people; don’t wait for them to contact you.

MISTAKE #3 - Sending one-liners

It’s amazing how many people using online personals send letters of the type “Hi, liked your profile, please see my profile”. If your photo does not impress the other person in an instant, it is most likely that they will just delete your email. Some *might* actually read your profile - and if there is nothing in your profile that impresses them in an instant, then they will also just delete your email.

BOTTOM LINE: Write letters that have some substance in them.

MISTAKE #4 - Sending form letters

I always know when I receive a form letter - always!
I am sure you know it too. If there are no personal references in the letter, I know this letter was not written specially for me. No one wants to be one of the crowd. Every person wants to be special!

BOTTOM LINE: Write individual letters for each person you contact.

MISTAKE #5 - Writing boring letters

Many people are guilty of this one. They write about things they want to say and not what the other person wants to hear.
The result: letters that are plain BORING. Remember: it’s not about YOU – it’s about THEM! Tell them what you liked about their profile so much that you decided to write to them. Some things may be uncertain in their profiles – ask questions and guess the answers. For example, she ticked “Tell you later” in her profile about kids – if she did not have any kids, she would say so. Ask if she has kids and tell her that you think she does and that you just love kiddies. A person who actually THINKS and what is more – thinks ABOUT HER, is indeed someone special, and your letter is sure to get noticed. Don’t talk much about yourself in your letter (she can always read your profile) - tell her why you think you will be the right guy for HER. If you do not fit her requirements 100%, tell her why it won’t be a problem. You pride yourself as having a great sense of humor? Back up your claim – make her laugh! From the first line, your letter should grab her attention and she should not be able to stop reading till the end. THEN she will be certainly compelled to check your profile on the Internet personals website.

BOTTOM LINE: Write interesting letters - the type of letters you'd like to receive.

MISTAKE #6 - Contacting dozens of members at once

Once people pay for their premium membership to the online dating site, they tend to contact dozens of members at once. The reason for that is that they don’t hope to receive much response. STOP for a minute: what are you actually looking for? Most of us are interested to start a relationship with someone special. In fact, all you need is only one person - but the one who is RIGHT for you. Do you really want to correspond with 50 people at a time? Spend more time reading profiles on the site, and then select a precious few that you like most and write to them. Make sure you get responses from your favorites before contacting other people.

BOTTOM LINE: Don’t contact dozens of people at once – concentrate on the ones you like the most.

MISTAKE #7 - Not following up

Let’s face it: we live in a fast-paced world. We tell people “Let’s get together soon” and forget it in an instant. We send an email, never get a response and lose the contact forever. This is extremely important when using Internet personals: if you do not get a response, follow up. Send another email. Tell them you are waiting for an answer and you want to hear from them even if they are NOT interested. Having somebody who is really interested in you is not very common nowadays. This very fact may convince people to answer you. Check if they are premium members. If they are not, they might have to pay the membership fee before they are allowed to answer your email, and this is the reason why they did not respond. Check the rules of the website before assuming they are not interested.

BOTTOM LINE: Follow up. Make sure there are no technical problems averting your contact.

MISTAKE #8 - Not having a photo in your profile

If you don’t have a picture in your profile, you are missing out on people’s attention a great deal. Many great singles, men and women alike, NEVER answer mails from members without photos - leave alone writing to them. If you are concerned about privacy, take a photo where you are in the distance and hardly recognizable, or put on sunglasses. Smiling broadly also changes your face.

BOTTOM LINE: Put a photo in your profile. This is proven to increase your chances up to 10 times.

MISTAKE #9 - Bad body language on the photos

When people look at your photos, they try to figure out what kind of person you are. If you cross your arms and legs, or in any other way “cover” your body on the photos, placing a barrier between you and the viewer, you make them think you are timid, insecure and lack confidence. Use open body language - open palms, arms on the sides of your body – never “covering” it, smile and “look” the viewers in the eyes.

BOTTOM LINE: Check your body language - people make their opinion about your personality by looking at your photos.

MISTAKE #10 - Giving up

You’ve tried this and that and nothing worked, so you give up: “Internet dating just doesn’t work for me”. That’s the biggest mistake of all. What you should do is to use your negative experience and learn WHY it did not work. Look at profiles of other people that attracted you and compare it with your own profile. Try to change your wording. Get a new photo with a happy smile. Try to contact someone you feel nothing about and see how it goes. Maybe you are just trying too hard? Treat your search for a partner as you would treat the search for a new job: if at first you don’t succeed, try and try again. Make it your habit to check new listings every day and write to one person. See what works and use it again. Borrow ideas from other people. Just don’t give up!

BOTTOM LINE: Online dating works. All you need to do is to gain experience. Practice makes perfect. Your special person is waiting for you!

Disclaimer:
The previous 10 commonly made mistakes were published in an article that was published on www.soulmades.com.au and was created by Elena Solomon.
Please note that www.ULooking4Me.com has no affiliation and/or business relation with Elana Solomon and/or with the website where this article was published.
We have decided to place this article because we think that it is relevant to our members.